by Carolee Sherwood
What has five feet and lots of rhythm? Iambic pentameter, of course! Iambic is a particular unit of rhythm (called feet) — two syllables, an unstressed one followed by a stressed one, like this: da-DUM! Pentameter tells us how many of them are on each line — five.
I most often think of Shakespeare when I consider iambic pentameter. “What light through yonder window breaks?” (Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene 2). “Now cracks a noble heart. Good-night, sweet prince; / And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest (Hamlet, Act V, Scene 2).
Rhythm is critical to a poem. Whether it’s structured or not, rhythm can make a poem more — or less — readable. It takes training for our voices to use rhythm and avoid the “sing-song” trap. Lion cubs, puppies and other critters train to hunt through play: rough-housing their litter mates. We’re going to do the same thing: rough-house with our litter mates.
For this installment of “Games Poets Play,” we’re going to have a conversation, in iambic pentameter, in the comments section of this post. For example, someone may say, “Let’s see if we can talk in metered rhyme!” And then someone else may say, “That is the worst idea I’ve ever heard!” (Yeah, there’s a slight extra syllable in this one, but it still “sounds” right.)
You can say anything you want, as long as it’s in iambic pentameter and as long as it moves the conversation along (and is not too rough — remember we are playing). Please don’t put anything in the comments that’s not part of the actual discussion taking place in iambic pentameter because that may be confusing.
Who wants to go first?
Carolee Sherwood is a poet and artist who lives in Upstate New York. She is co-editor of Ouroboros Review, mother of three boys and a veteran Read Write Poem columnist. You can find her rambling about the creative life at Carolee Sherwood and drafting poems at I Am Maureen.
now i’ll have five-foot tracks across my brain
I will go first, just noting as I go
that many lines are headless (no first “da”)
and many times an unstressed “da” will linger
(just like that “er” that dribbled after “ling.”)
The alternation and the five strong beats
Are all you really need to make the line.
This is hard to do first thing on Monday.
I never thought I’d really write this way.
It sounds so trite, and colors what I say.
This is a lovely way to start the day!
Sometimes change is exactly what we need…
Dear Dale, my thanks for noting that dead head
(I’ve often wondered how it came to be).
On further now, could you describe for me
how a poet describes triplet feet beat?
what’s this? the line, the horseman, lost their heads?
those beasts will frighten all the maidens off!
Describing anapests and dactyls in
pentameter? Good God. They’re galloping,
or pattering: they run as fast as speech.
You must slow down to speak pentameter.
It has more stresses than ord’nary speech.
But anapests and dactyls run along
quite happy, like a girl on a bus
who chatters on her phone and drives you mad.
oh, my! dear dale! how you describe the beat
with skill and manage many syllables!
good morning, molly! hi to deb! and look –
it’s julie jordan scott! and jim! and kate!
and thank you, nelle, for greeting us so soon!
It looks like spring which always makes me think
of moldy things now growing in my sink.
I realize my line is off the thread
but it’s the first thing that was in my head.
no fair! my lines recall a childlike doctor seuss*
and dale’s are easy going and instructive.*
i need a new vocabulary one
with words such as illuminate and such,
like agitate and fornicate, et. al.
(*i know! i have too many syllables.)
rob kistner replied:
March 15th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
doc Seuss is more than kids stuff Carolee
his simple verse is filled with irony
his word play pleased the young and poked the old
there’s wisdom in the stories that he told
oh, dave, egads! a rhyme? while practicing?
and quite impressive on a monday morn’!
and this, my tiny ode to tuesday: here’s
a happy, happy thought. it’s monday now
but won’t be once another day begins.
i never learned to sing the metric scale
can you fit iambs into kyriell
and do short tons and long tons scan the same
when measured drat per drop as damn per gram
now I’m not sure where this will head
but I will help to pull the thread
to stretch it far as it will go
then sit and watch it grow and grow
(at first my word count was a little off
but now I think I have it straightened out)
I’m still not sure where this strange game will head
but I will do my best to pull the thread
to stretch it out as far as it will go
then stay right here and watch it grow and grow
The trick’s no trick at all;
just find the beat and see it through.
It’s like a bouncing ball;
it’s not so very hard to do.
But making sense, and still
to hope the meter comes out right
is test enough. I will.
I will. I will. I will. I might.
My comment waits its moderation.
I posted fast, with great elation,
but now I have to wait to see
if moderation’s kind to me.
I hope the moderation gods are kind,
accept my post & blow my mind.
I realized my penta’s tetra (Bad!)
I did not count the feet I should have had.
But now it’s five per line, as feet should be;
I should have counted better. Pardon me!
Poetic license lets you add some feet;
conventions are not ev’rything to meet
when purpose trumps the form and storied rhyme,
a poet’s free to alter verse each time.
My punctuation’s off a little there.
My hasty post my errors then must bear.
I’m sorry for the pentametric rhyme;
this classic style evokes it every time.
I have to blame my meter on the bard -
The years of teaching Shakespeare make it hard
To move away from thinking in this style.
(The only rhyme I think of here is “smile,”
Which just won’t do to move the trail along)
So let me end this post that’s over-long.
I rather like this rhythmic back and forth
But tell me is it better if it rhymes?
Rhyming suits some moods, some not so much.
It just depends on what you’re striving for.
Rhyme can be leaden. Sometimes, just a touch
of assonance, alliteration, or
word repetition gives you what you need;
a thread to bind your work internally
and make the whole thing livelier to read.
(My two cents. Others here might disagree.)
There’s something about rhyme, though, when it comes
up naturally, not tortured, almost as
a spring emerges from the ground, or some
botanic metaphor, perhaps. Rhyme has
a soft imperative that calls it forth
and leaves you no choice but to give it birth.
of course it’s not important that it rhymes
as long as we are counting beats per line
And Rob has got it right of course dear friends
It matters not if iambs rhyme it’s feet
of them that beat five times each line da dum
Oh Will,how could you write so much so well?
Then I’ll try to stop the rhyming part for now
And add it only when it helps to illustrate
A message that I am working on of late
Oops it sneaked in when I wasn’t looking…
My!
Oh Wanda dear tis good to see you here
your expertise is needed once again
I sit back, quite amazed by what I see –
Metrical verse still lives, how can that be?
Wasn’t the funeral long, long ago?
Shows how little the experts do know….
But isn’t it fun to resurrect what’s dead?